Confession time

I have a confession. I love to watch the growth of other people.
I realized it a little while ago when my husband asked me why I was so obsessed with analyzing 'The Next Food Network Star.' I loved 'Who Wants to Be A Superhero?' for the same reason.
In each of these shows, and in most of our lives; we have a goal or dream. Each of us has the potential to achieve that dream- otherwise we wouldn't have been chosen to be tested and tried. Trials come in three parts- and as I watch these shows, I see how the reactions of the participants to these three trial elements determines who goes home each week. Oddly enough, for those of a literary mindset, the trials match the types of conflicts in stories.
The first trial each person must overcome is Man versus Situation. At first, when there are lots of different people in the group, it is how each participant responds to the situation/challenge of the week that determines who stays and who goes. On the Food Network, those who cannot cook or cannot capture the camera quickly go home, leaving only those who have discovered how to overcome the situations they are placed in with patience and some degree of focus. The questions to be asked in this trial are "How do you respond under pressure? Do you bend, or do you break? Do you know when and how to ask for help?"
The second trial each person must overcome is Man versus Man. Studies are showing that the ability to get along with and work with other people is a key determining factor to success in life, outranking raw talent and skills. A look at the newer curriculums for schools and business models shows a growing trend towards emphasizing the ability to work with and get along with other people. The days of cubicles are fading fast, replaced by more productive and energetic collaborative models. Social skills, best learned when young and malleable, are finally getting the emphasis they deserve. On the Food Network, especially with this last season, we see that the humble yet confident ability to work with and around others of differing skills and skill levels can be the difference between staying for this week and going home.
The third trial each person must overcome, and in my personal opinion, the hardest, is Man versus Self. At multiple points in our lives, we need to really find out who we are, not just what we are capable of doing. Thankfully, others can help us in our quest to find ourselves. Many people, especially children, can tell when you are being genuine and true to yourself or whether you are playing a role. As this season of The Next Food Network Star draws to a conclusion, this is trial that will send you home.
If you don't know how to cook many things, they can teach you.
If you don't play nicely with others, especially those you don't like or who seem to be working at cross-purposes, this too can be taught (it should be taught as an essential part of school- especially if you are homeschooling).
If you don't know who you are in a specific role- there's not much that can be done. Mentors and others you interact with can tell you when you are close and when you missed, but it's like playing the warmer/colder game. It takes time, and often takes a different amount of time for each person. Find those people who can tell when you are being genuine and use their comments to guide you.

I graduated with my degree in Elementary Education. I had the knowledge base and the methods. I knew the theories of child development and the ability to plan, differentiate, and integrate curriculum to take advantage of the developmental levels of my students. My weakness, and one that my teachers could not help me with, was classroom management. I did not know what was truly important and what was just social niceties. Gimmicks didn't work for me. I could teach a short lesson and do just fine, but extended contact with a group of kids quickly showed that something was lacking in my abilities. I tried mimicking the style of my cooperating teachers, and sometimes I was successful, other times the kids looked at me as though I'd come from a different planet. It wasn't until I started listening to the kids that I realized what I was missing. I needed a vision of what was truly important, and a safe place to escape from the pressures of teaching to focus just on who I was as a teacher.
The kids knew when I got it right, and they let me know. They also knew when I missed, and while they couldn't always tell me how I'd missed, they did tell me quite plainly when it happened. And so I spent two wonderful, life-changing years as an Americorps Literacy Aide at an elementary school. The teachers were patient with me and gave me opportunities to learn from their examples. Having 30+ examples of different styles and an entire year to observe from the sidelines showed me what I connected to, and the small groups I was able to practice with taught me how I teach. My mentors trusted me with responsibilities and approved of my efforts, but never failed to call me in for some sharp correction when it was needed. They helped me to instill the important things in my soul, and taught me to ask for help (a skill which my elementary and high school teachers had failed to teach me). To them I will ever be grateful. They helped me to burn away the dross from my soul and inspired me to focus on what is really important.

Now for my little push: Take a child development class- You'll also be better able to understand other people, especially children when they do weird things. (If you just want to study a little bit, look up Erickson's 8 stages, Vygotsky's zone of proximal development, and Piaget's theories- they cover pretty much everything). This really helped me to understand what was really important, and to never expect something contrary to the child's needs.